March 4, 2010
The RITA awards are, arguably, the Oscars of the romance writing world. To win a RITA is the highest honor a romance author can achieve. All entries are judged by other published romance authors on a scale of 1 to 9, with 9 being the highest. Romance Writers of America, the group that gives out the awards, sends a complicated judging sheet so that all the judges are on the same page. However, having just read the last of my RITA entries, I propose this new judging rubric:
9=Raging jealousy
8=Mild jealousy, able to be tempered by fact that author is much older than you
7=Sporadic jealousy, made bearable because author sucks at grammar, characterization, or dialogue
6=Want to have drink at bar w/ author at Romance Writers of America annual convention, but only if she's buying.
5=Don't want to have drink at bar w/ author, even if she's buying.
4=Might "accidentally" spill drink on author at bar for making you suffer through book
3=Will definitely spill drink on author, but will apologize sweetly, then run.
2=Will throw drink in author's face while quoting especially egregious excerpts from RITA entry book and yelling, "Four hours of my life, GONE! Forever!"
1=Will buy drink for author of RITA entry book because damn, that woman needs all the help she can get....
Comments
Great, Diana. Thanks for a morning laugh.
--Diana
Stephanie Feagan, RWA Treasurer and fellow RITA judge
(also, you should totes run for the board...just sayin')
I actually knew a grad student at Columbia U. who was teaching an undergrad course. He threw the papers down the stairs. A for every one that made it down. B+ to all the others. No one ever complained. Sigh.